DREAMING THAT I HAVE NO PROBLEM
We are always fascinated by our dreams. Though sometimes we don’t have any clue on what they mean, and we can’t even remember what we have dreamed about. Today, experts say that keeping a closer eye on our dreams can actually help us improve our lives.
What really happens When we go to sleep?
For the first 90 minutes when we sleep, we go through deepening stages — ranging from light to deep sleep. Thus, with REM sleep, our heart's rate and breathing become irregular, eyes move rapidly and our brain activity rises toward the same level as when we’re awake. That’s when we do about 80 percent of our active dreaming — and when dreams are most vivid. We’ll go through this sleep cycle three to five times during the night, spending more time in REM sleep with each one until we woke up in the morning.
Did you know that during our REM sleep, the rest of our body essentially becomes paralyzed. Simply because “It’s nature’s way of making sure we don’t act out our dreams, whether it’s repeatedly kicking your spouse or jumping off the bed and hurting ourselves...” but there are instances where the one who slept, never woke up. Meaning he died sleeping, sad thing though.
ALWAYS BE FASCINATED
What happens in our brain when we dream? Sleep experts say and admit that they’re not sure, but it appears that dreams are where our memories meet emotions. On the other hand, our dreams can help us tap into the emotional issues in our waking life. On the other hand, they’re also a way for our brain to catalog the events of the day. “We know that memories are stored during sleep, and dreaming allows the brain to use certain circuits that improve long-term memory,” Simply, we dream in order for a specific part of our mind to kick in and sort through memories, figuring out which ones to keep and which ones to let go, likened ourselves to a desktop or a laptop computer.
If dreams are there to help file away memories for the long haul, why do they sometimes seem so surreal—not the literal way life happens to us? “When we’re sleeping, the controls of our conscious mind are turned off,” says Dr. Kohler.
So as the brain sorts through our different experiences, trying to cross-reference memories (Is the day this happened the same day that happened?), it puts them together in strange and unusual ways (hence, our weird dreams) until it finds a connection that fits—and stores it in our memory bank. Remember when we defragment the hard drive of our computers?
Since dreams can help you tap into—and even solve—problems in your life, it pays to remember them. If your power of recall is lacking, Karen Muller, PhD, a clinical psychologist in Medford, Oregon, has an easy way to trigger your memory: Place paper and a pen next to your bed. When you wake up, even in the middle of the night, jot down as much as you remember. Can’t recall more than a fragment? Resume your normal sleeping position for a few minutes. “It helps you recall more of your dream,”
But Why Can’t I Remember My Dreams?
“We all dream several times a night, even if we don’t recall them,” says Michael Breus, PhD, author of The Sleep Doctor’s Diet Plan: Lose Weight Through Better Sleep. If you wake up at the end of a sleep cycle, you’ll likely remember a dream, but if you snooze through until the next one, you probably won’t. Since you have more REM sleep in the early a.m. hours, adds Dr. Breus, it’s easier to recall a dream when you wake up in the morning, versus, say, in the middle of the night. Age can play a role as well: REM sleep decreases as we get older—kids need more of its stimulation for brain development than adults—causing dreams to become less vivid
Is it True that You Never See Yourself in Your Dream?
No. “In my 30 years of practice, many of my clients have seen themselves in a dream,” says Dr. Delaney. Sometimes, however, you don’t look like yourself. So if you’re walking around in Angelina Jolie’s body in your dream, is it just wishful thinking?
Probably not. She could simply represent some part of your personality and the dream is trying to point out the similarities. “Your brain is sending a message that you have some qualities of this person, whether it’s someone you know in real life or not,” says Dr. Delaney. “And what you think that person represents, the feelings she or he evokes, could be the key to something you’re dealing with in your own life.” So rather than revealing that you covet Angelina’s looks, your dream may be drawing parallels to her philanthropic and nurturing nature and your own desire to give back in some way—or have more kids.
I Have Recurrent Nightmares. How Can I Get Rid of Them?
You’re not alone. Research suggests that up to 8 percent of adults suffer from chronic nightmares, like drowning or being chased, at least once a week. “Most of the time, they’re triggered by ongoing stress,”. “Bad dreams are your mind’s way of processing stress and figuring out how to deal with it in the future.”
One popular method: Imagery rehearsal therapy (IRT), which focuses on changing harmful thought patterns. A landmark study published in The Journal of the American Medical Association found that 65 percent of people who used the therapy had significantly fewer nightmares. “During IRT, my patients write down their nightmare, then think of a way to change it for the better,” says Dr. Harris. “One patient had a recurring dream of being in shark-infested water. She changed the sharks to friendly dolphins and visualized this new dream for five minutes twice a day—once in the morning, and once before bed. Her nightmares disappeared within weeks.”
Why Do My Dreams Seem So Real that I Sometimes Wake Up Crying or Laughing?
Because your brain is just as active when you dream as when you’re awake, says Dr. Barrett. In fact, some areas of your brain—like the occipital lobe, which processes images, and the amygdala, which regulates emotions—are even
more active when you’re dreaming, “which is why a dream can seem so vivid and evoke so much emotion,” says Dr. Barrett. Pay attention to any negative emotions your dream evokes, especially if they stay with you for the rest of the day, advises Tore Nielsen, PhD, professor of psychiatry and director of the Dream and Nightmare Laboratory at the University of Montreal. “Think of the most recent time you felt the way you did in your dream. Upon reflection, you may realize that you felt that way when you argued with your husband recently, or when you ran into someone who was rude. It usually doesn’t take much digging to figure out the source of that emotion, and doing so can help you get closure.”
Can Dreams Predict My Life's Future?
A lot of us have had dreams that foreshadowed an actual event—a relative’s death, the breakup of a relationship. But in reality, a prophetic dream, even one about something unexpected, is just bringing to light an issue you’ve been subconsciously worried about, says Dr. Barrett. If you wake up from a dream feeling disturbed, ask yourself, Have there been hints of that situation in my daily life that I’ve ignored? Say you dreamt of losing your job. Have you recently had any unnerving discussions with your boss?
If you dream of medical ailments like heart attacks, take it seriously, say experts. “Many of my students and associates have had recurring dreams that alerted them to health problems,”. “It’s your body’s subtle way of telling you that something strange is going on. If you have a dream like this more than a few times, see your doctor to get checked out.”
The same holds true if you dream about sex with a man you don’t know. “When you wake up, ask yourself what characteristics the stranger had, and whether or not those are traits you wish your husband possessed,” says Dr. Barrett. Most of the time, pleasant sex dreams don’t mean you’re dissatisfied with your sex life or unhappy in your marriage. You just want a little of what your “dream” man symbolizes, like assertiveness, say, or nurturing.
When should you take note? “If the dream involves a negative, like having sex in public while strangers recoil, it could be your own sexual anxieties spilling over into your dreams,”. Perhaps you’re feeling embarrassed about something your husband wants you to do in bed. Your best bet in this case? Talk to him about it.
I Dreamt of Another Woman Last Night. What Does That Mean?
Most of us have sex-related dreams at one time or another, but dreaming about an old girlfriend or a hunky coworker “doesn’t mean that you want to cheat on your wife,”. Sex dreams are less about wanting to have sex with that person and more about desiring an attribute he represents. So if you dream about a college fling, for example, “you may be feeling nostalgic for a time when you were young and carefree,”
Remember since dreams can help us tap into—and even solve—problems in our lives, it pays to remember them. If our power of recall is lacking, there's an easy way to trigger our memory: Place paper and a pen next to your bed. When you wake up, even in the middle of the night, jot down as much as you remember. Can’t recall more than a fragment? Resume your normal sleeping position for a few minutes. “It helps you recall more of your dream,”
